As for the actual show, it was ok. Half way through the night I got a little bored. James Franco wasn't used as much as I would have liked. For example he could have done an Acting with James Franco segment that he does on Funny or Die (it's very enjoyable and Dave his little bro is too cute and hilarious). He also could have expressed his love for me by dying his hair blonde and reenacting my favourite scenes from Freaks and Geeks, but I guess the Oscars does cater to a broader and less me audience.
Since I won and I feel in generous mood I am going to say nice things about the actors that won in the major categories.
Colin Firth: Umm you are the most adorable man in the world. I feel like technically you shouldn't be attractive but dammit you are. I enjoyed the clip they showed from your movie when you cried about not being able to be a king. Oh I just want to pinch you!
Natalie Portman: Oh Natalie, you're pregnant, beautiful, talented, engaged, and was in my favourite movie of the year. On top of that I'm only like thiry-five percent jealous of you because you seem like someone I would want to hang out with.
Also when I watched you in the post-show press junket, you handled the stupidest questions ever so politely. Example: Q-"Natalie are you going to name your unborn son Oscar?" R-"Actually I don't know the sex of my child, but no Oscar will probably not be the name."
Good job, I would have been super sarcastic. Plus you proove my theory that all beautiful women are named Natalie (find me an ugly Natalie, just try!).
Melissa Leo: Where do I start? Seriously, I had no idea who you were until The Fighter and even now you are unrecognizable compared to your character. I did enjoy that you said "fuck" in your acceptance speech. But also it's a shame you said "fuck", because after all your hard work as an actor and winning against all odds the Academy Award, you will always be known as the girl who said "fuck".
Christian Bale: I like that you have a cockney accent. I don't like that you look like Charles Manson. I like your work in The Fighter. I don't like how unbelievably attracted I was to you in American Psycho, it made me think long and hard about the kind of person I am.
So hurray for the winners, hurray for Hollywood, hurray for me, and it hurts me to admit this, but hurray for Anne Hathaway. I liked her hosting abilities. She was, dare I say, sincere. That and all her dresses were wicked awsome amazing.
So another Oscars (my Christmas) has come and gone, it's a little sad but I'm happy I was able to share it with you all! Have a good night.
Thanks for reading!!
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| I miss blonde James Franco, it was simpler times then |
PS. Shout out to Elly who sat through the Oscars with me and my cat who in the end forced her to go home with an allergic reaction. There is only one real rule I adhere to in life: If Skyla sits next to you sprinkle her with water in the face until she leaves, I don't care how cute you think she is.
Alright, so I basically agree with everything said, except for Anne Hatheway's dresses. The red one was the only good one. The rest were like she was going to prom on mars. I watched the oscars in the worst possible scenario. In a crowded loud bar, with noone interested in watching except me and 5 other ppl. Also there was an auction going on. And the oscars were in spanish, but delayed spanish. so i could hear the english to start and then a spanish voice would race to talk over top of it. Oh and it was spanish men for women talking and spanish women for men talking. And even with the voice of a woman, Colin Firth is still the hottest thing ever.
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