E-Huh? How To Travel With Your Parents As An Adult

Travelling is a remarkable experience, that can truly enrich the relationships with those that you have chosen to travel with. But what happens when that choice is your parents?

Yes I love my parents, and in thirty years I will look back and think wow, what a remarkable thing to have travelled with them for three weeks in Europe. As an idea, travelling with the parental-units is glorious. Literally spending 21 days with them in an enclosed space is tricky. Here are some How To's in navigating what seems like the impossible.

First How: How to get to sleep at night. Unless your rich, travelling with your parents means you have to share a hotel room. Now, I don't want to generalize things but it seems that most people over fifty snore. What do you do? Unfortunately ear plugs are out of the question because THEY DON'T WORK. If someone could explain to me how sleeping with a squished piece of plastic in your ear, is not only comfortable, but does not slowly move in the night like there is a tiny, fat insect in your ear I would like to hear it (seriously, could you recommend a brand or something).
The real trick for getting a quiet night's sleep is making a kind of fort with your pillow. This way the pillow covers the ears but not the nose or mouth. Unfortunately, you may experience dreams of smothering.
If you still cannot wrap your head around sleeping with a pillow balanced ever so slightly above you ear, one can make a game of the noises coming out of your parents' sinuses. To the untrained ear a snore may sound like an irritating grumble. But to the snore connoisseur it can sound like the base line to "Jungle Boogie" by Kool and the Gang. Now you can ease yourself into sleep with the funky listening styles of Kool and his sick beats.

Second How: How to do what you want to do. Travelling with anyone is definitely a compromise, but with your parents it is a dictatorship. No fear, you can do what you want as long as you adjust the idea of what it is you want to do. For example, your mother wants to go into another church and your father want to go into another "European" supermarket. What do you do? (and no the correct answer is not to shoot yourself.) The answer is to grow as a person. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? So slap on a smile and say "Yes, I totally want to see another terrifying Jesus picture, where his eyes follow you and his wounds glow." And "Yes, It is amazing that cheese in Rome is much more inexpensive than in Canada, fascinating." As long as you say yes, you might actually start to enjoy what you're doing. (Keep in mind for longer than a month of travel, your soul  may be crushed so use with discretion.)

Third How: How to remain "cool." Ok, so I am not the smoothest person, but I still believe that my age alone gives me the power to be somewhat hip. However after weeks of having conversations with your parents about the fact that your father has nose hair, your grip on what is current begins to waver. The only advice I can offer is, this too shall pass. Hold onto your core and know who you are. You may feel your "coolness" being tested when you pass by clothing stores and think, hey sweet sweater-vest. Or that when hanging out with friends, you try to explain to them that 1960's Italo-Folk/Pop is actually kind of good. FIGHT THAT FEELING. Go home listen to really offensive rap, and then watch six episodes of The Jersey Shore. Don't worry, soon enough you will be back to normal.

With these simple steps you will be saying yes, looking cool and sleeping soundly; the makings of any great voyage. So next vacation before you want to have a good time think, hey maybe I want to invite my parents along.

Bon Voyage and Thanks.
-Classic-Al

Could You Survive Three Weeks With Them?